Give Him your hand,
He will guide you,
Give Him your mind
He will teach you
Give Him your eyes
You'll see so clearly
Give Him your heart
He'll love dearly
Yes He will . . .*
In 1986, songwriter, singer, and guitarist Stephen Michael Camp left New Mexico and moved to the cold and snowy Northeast. By 1994, missing "those mile-high deserts and old pueblos," and longing to return, he wrote, "Good-bye to New England," and now added, "But I'll take one of her daughters when I go . . . back to New Mexico."*
I was introduced as a Paste-Up Artist Two to this newly hired manager of the large newspaper advertising company where I'd worked part-time for six years. Four months later, when he fired all such workers, although my dislike had been prompted by an overheard conversation, upset, I had asked to meet with him. He refused. I cleared my drawing board, collected my things, and going out the exit noted the sound of the door shutting behind me. Partway across the parking lot I suddenly stopped—surprised, then puzzled. Why had a wave of relief just washed over me?
In the following three years, our paths crossed twice. Once, unexpectedly, we had simultaneously seen one another in a store, and both of us had fled. Another time, answering the backdoor bell, I'd entered the kitchen to see a Darth Vader–like figure at the screen door. Realizing I was wearing only a slip, I'd spun around to return properly dressed. The man who now held his helmet in his hand was Stephen, in a black spandex bicycling outfit, there to inquire about a beach cottage rental.
In 1990, as a new member of A Course in Miracles* weekly night-time meetings, I returned the second week and settled into a meditation chair. The man across from me looked familiar, but I couldn't place him. Upon leaving, I asked his name—Stephen Camp—he replied forthrightly. Upon hearing it, I hastily proceeded to the door. Going down the stairs, I told a co-leader of my experience with him. "Your paths are probably meant to cross," she replied. I started my car, wondering.
Give Him your poverty,
And true wealth will be yours,
Give Him your fears
And He'll open the door
To the peace of God that lies within you
And the love of God that will surround you,
Yes it will. . .*
Stephen told me he only wanted to sing his songs to God. Together for six years, we toured on two coasts, presenting both his music talent and my writing talent. Then, taken by surprise in his early fifties, Stephen learned that he had a medical condition predicted to end his life in nine months. He would live for eleven, both of us incrementally accepting and surrendering to God's timing. I had been with Stephen in the spiritual truth of his songs; now beyond three months of both tears and talks with God, I shaped my new life alone with Stephen’s words still present. I lived with the truth of a question I would not hear until twenty-six years in the future. "Do I love you more for you? Or do I love you more for me?" *
Give Him your life
He will remake you
In the image of God
That lies within you
Give Him your life
He'll not forsake you
And surrender's the only way to win
Yes it is.*
My realization is, "Learning to love for the other may take experiences with one or more people, one or more opportunities, one or more journeys, even one or more years. What matters is that our truth of why we love another must also be the truth of love."
* Stephen Michael Camp, "Good-bye to New England," (Springfield, MA:1993), Video.
* A Course in Miracles (ACIM) is a unique spiritual self-study program designed to awaken us to the truth of our oneness with God and Love. https://acim.org/
* Stephen Michael Camp, "Give Him Your Hand," Surrender (Amherst, MA: Watercourse Studios,
1992), Cassette.
* As heard on Northwest National Public Broadcasting (NWPB) Radio Schedule, April/May 2022, Source Unk.